Every ward has one: the girl who is hopelessly devoted to the Cool Guyzz. And okay, who among us hasn't crushed on an EQP at least once in our lives? The difference is that this girl has absolutely no shame. None whatsoever. Refer to this sample conversation:
EQG: So I saw on your Facebook that you like "The Office". I do too. Can I come up to Budge Hall and watch with you and your friends?
EQP: Yes? [thinking] What is this girl's name...
EQG: Great! It's a date! And I already have your number from the ward directory so I will text you about it, and, just in case, I'll write on your wall. Please respond on my wall so people know I interact with boys.
[ten minutes later]
EQG [text from her to him]: I was reading your wall-to-wall with [other boy in ward], and I saw that you guys are going to the dollar theater tonight. I'll be there.
Now, this is an exaggeration*, and the rest of us always stare in disgust at her grossly forward ways at ward prayer...but deep down we burn with envy because at least she's talking to them.
*no it's not
