The Shrubbery

This specimen, female, usually comes from a town that has more cows than humans. Where there is also something in the water that makes a girl look at herself in the mirror and say, "you know what would look good on the top of my head? A snarled rat's nest made of human hair." These girls spend hours brushing, combing, blow drying, straightening, and then decide to sic the top of their head at the high speed ceiling fan for that Phil Spector look. Generally speaking, you can apply the law that the higher the hair, the lower the IQ.

Although not quite sure what they're hoping to achieve with this look, it definitely could serve as a Venus Fly Trap type of approach; attracting their prey with sheer curiosity, and then grabbing hold with a death grip of intricate snarls. Going into hair salons they just request the Chinese Finger Trap or the Devil's Snare.

Sitting behind them in a class with a lot of visual cues, or a hot professor can be somewhat vexing, but if you're behind them in a three hour snooze fest of an evening class you might as well be wearing an invisibility cloak because you can get away with whatever you want! Whether it's taking a little nap, having a picnic, or giving yourself a sponge bath, you can count on that iron curtain of ratted hair to keep you from your professor's sight.